Morning Bliss!

Surprises come in all forms!

 

Good morning my fellow Bloggers, I am going to share some news with you this morning.

Pops has a Doctors appointment for his Hypertension today, so we decided to deliver the news to you. Just like your Blogs they go up and down as you humans also experience in your life riding the roller coaster of life.

This morning is on the up! Wait and see how the Doctors visit goes!!!!

Do we still have your attention? I hope so, this news is important to our pops, he recently had a DNA test done and wishes for us to share the news with you. It was painless from what I hear and very simple. Would you like to see the results? Well let me hear you sing!

 

 

Who knows, some of us just may be related in way or another!

 

My Ancestory Video Submission

Most everyone here know that Genealogy is one of my hobbies and passions of finding lost relatives. Ancestry was having a contest and the winner would be selected from a vast pool of submissions. I thought here is my chance for my 15 minutes of fame and glory -so I thought.

I was excited and nervous at the same time. I was like Ralphie from A Christmas Story fantasizing of that Red Ryder BB rifle. I gathered material I would need, wrote a rough draft, made sure equipment worked and proceeded to shoot my video submission that I thought would lead to certain destiny calling me. I took three videos and edited the best one that I was sure to bring me the Oscar or at least nominations. I carefully selected still images for branding, employing key animations thinking to myself this would be the icing on the cake.  Once I was sure with my delusions, I enter their site, I found the link to add my video that would lead to stardom waiting. All big eyed dreaming, salivating and fantasizing of glory to come, I caressed the mouse with deep breaths and clicked the button to upload a masterpiece -so I thought.

I waited patiently for any type of communication, one if by email, two if by phone, three if by Facebook, but no words, no communication came, and that was that. The dream crushed and grinded like refined chopped nuts, spirits shattered and shared to the delusions of grandeur in the moment.

This Morning – A Brief post!

Good morning everyone, I hope all you are doing good and having a good day or evening.

This morning I opened my email and I got a reply back from one that I sent out on August 6th of this year.

The message:

“Hello, Michael, yes I am the person you are looking for.    I did not respond as we found your Blog found too much information about us, that we would appreciate you deleting. I would correspond with you but would not like to see it on your Blog.  Much appreciate if you considered……”

This is from my sister, the one that I have been searching for, the good news is that I did find her, maybe there is something to my Uncle Joe calling me Sherlock.  So, to respect their wishes, I will have to delete some earlier posts.

The post that it will effect are:

THE WAITING GAME Published on MARCH 23, 2015

FOLLOW UP ON POST- THE WAITING GAME Published on JULY 31, 2015

and this one:

I BELIEVE I FOUND MY SISTER Published on AUGUST 6, 2015

These will be the post that I will permanently delete from this blog.

Candy

The last post I wrote July 1993, was a tough one for me, but I got through it. I appreciate all that have liked and left me heart warming comments on that post and sharing their memories too, as well as tweeted and shared via other mediums (Please feel free to continue the sharing). I encourage that! Again, I appreciate you all.

Today I thought I would bring some levity back and another recipe that is so simple a Monkey can do it.

Ask yourself, what kid doesn’t want candy when offered candy.

One could say my Dad had a sense of humor or trickery within him. I think I was just plain naive as a young child.

Dad was cooking something in the kitchen one day when we kids were little, we asked what was that? He said, CANDY!

We go CANDY! We want candy!

You think that I being the eldest would have caught on by now. The Hershey candy bar experience that was not Hershey at all but Exlax wrapped up in a Hershey wrapper should have stuck with me. But, I heard CANDY, all other brain functions are out the window.

On to the photos, of the so called CANDY.

Step1: Three Yellow Corn Tortillas. I used Mission Brand.

Step 2″ Cut into bite size pieces.

Step 3: Heat about a capful or less of vegetable oil in a pan and add the cut up Corn tortillas. Medium heat

Step 4: Stir/flip often we only want to slightly brown and crisp the Corn tortillas.

Step 5: Add one egg

Step 6: Add a little table salt and enjoy. One thought I had was to add some salsa to this, just a pinch.

When I was married, I made this so called CANDY for my brother in-law at the time. What better way to attempt to welcome him. He took one look at it and eyes rolled and his nose became a snob-it was very obvious.

Later on today/evening, once I get my photos to the desktop and cropped, I will show another recipe for Beef Enchilada with Red enchilada sauce. Sauce homemade not canned.

Why did I use that Feature photo on top? It has nothing to do with food!

1: I am fond of the show the “IT Crowd” a shame it only had a four year run.

2. If you look at my menu above where you see the About Me, I have put a PC Help Desk tab/page there. Right now it says “Under Construction” So, I will be working on that page for a while before I publish it.

Levity -Humor at my expense. A True Story!

So, a few nights ago, while I was sleeping a weird thing happened. Now, have you ever had one of those nights where you feel you’re asleep but not really…?

I hear a young girl saying ready Dad and a man’s voice saying OK. Then all of a sudden I hear this loud scream, I hear the man saying Oh my god! Clair, are you ok! I hear the girl crying and whispering.

I jump out of bed like Flash Gordon would; start to put my pants on. I notice Deb is looking at me very strange-like what the hell are you doing? That kind of look you get from your significant other letting you know you are doing something that they think is dumb.

While I pull the zipper up, I told her what I heard. I was surprised she did not hear it because it was FREAKING loud. As I am about to button my pants, she tells me it was the TV. There is nothing outside. I start to look at Deb like a damn Deer does when caught in headlights. “What?” I move closer to the bedroom window and I am hearing silence. WTF! In my daze of sleep but not asleep I feel confused.

After I fall asleep, Deb, if still awake will put in one of her DVD’s. And that is exactly what she did. I will admit this has never happened to me before. Once Deb realized I was out cold, she played her DVD so that she could fall asleep. At some point during the wee hours of the morning, I think it was 2 AM is when the weird event happened. The DVD that was playing, Heroes.

Story to be filed for my son.

Reconnecting with Family – Under A Sad Event Part 2

Tuesday July 14, 2015 around 3 PM

I left off with meeting my first cousin Karin and Aunt Patricia. If you wish to review that post then please read: Reconnecting with Family – Under A Sad Event Part 1.

Around 3pm  or a bit after, my cousin Bob picked up his grand nephew and me. While Nicholas ( grand nephew) was swimming, I got to enjoy a one on one conversation with Bob.  We caught up with our current lives and reminisced of old days-it was a blast. Here is one kicker, for the past twenty-three years he has been employed as a Computer System Administrator, and me having a fondness for computers obtained an A.A.S  Degree in Network Systems Administration.

Five O’clock and on.

The most part of the time I spent in California was setting around, small light conversing and meeting new cousins I have never met. I am the one with the camera around my neck.

I will say the heat in California since I have been away for some time, was HOT! Eight in the morning and sweat would be pouring off you. Hell my balls were yelling no more! The nights while sleeping even with a wall ac running reminded me of -the nights of past of waking up with the pillow soaked from your sweat.  My body temperature I do believe has acclimated to South Dakota.

Wednesday July 15, 2015 the day of the service.

Me lighting the candle of life and remembrance.

This was the rough day. When my mother past in 2002, I had thought all tears were gone from that point on…. I was wrong. First was the lighting of the candles by family members then friends. I was strong, I was doing good I had thought-no tears and throat not choking.  But, when I placed the candle on the table next to the other lit ones, that is when it hit me. She is gone! My throat was closing up as I fought back Niagra Falls.

 

Reconnecting with Family – Under A Sad Event Part 1

Those who read my blog, will know that I recently left Sioux Falls, SD to attend a funeral in California. As I mentioned before, Sheila was my paternal first cousin and my Dad’s favorite niece. Those of us who were raised or around her were blessed in everyway for knowing her.  I created a virtual memorial at Find A Grave so that she will never be forgotten and so that other relatives who were not able to attend may find the virtual memorial. For those who do not know what Find A Grave is – here is the definition: [Find A Grave is a commercial website that allows the public to access and add to an online database of cemetery records.]

Sheila, whom I addressed as Aunt, was a strong willed individual. At birth, I remember my Dad telling me she was born premature and very tiny. I was reminded while in California that her nickname was Inky for she was in an incubator for a month or two before coming home. They used a dresser drawer to place Sheila in and that became her bed for awhile. She survived and became a person whom we cherished. Later on in the early 90’s Sheila suffered a major heart attack and she was not expected to live long after that, yet she did. Hit with another ailment, she was not expected to survive more than three months, yet she did. Sheila was a fighter to the end. May we grow our own strength of survival from her.

Tuesday July 14, 2015 1:30PM

Karin, Aunt Patricia and me.

During my stay in California with my cousins, the day before the services I was fortunate to have finally met my first cousin Karin and her Mother my Aunt Patricia whom I have never met before. This side of the family comes from my Mother. Patricia is my Mother’s sister. The visit lasted for about an hour and it was a very good visit despite the nerves of visiting with a part of your family that you thought would never happen. We caught up on the regular stuff that most would and talked about what my Mother told me about growing up in the Bradford house and compared notes per say.

I must admit I was taken by surprise when I saw them face to face, for cousin Karin has the same hair color as my Mother. When I heard Aunt Patricia speak, the tone and the manner was the same as my Mothers.   Stay tuned for part 2 of this posting

Family dynamics -A candid look into my Mother’s life Part II

I will be adding another video today on how to restore old photos but, I also wanted to finish up on an earlier post. I believe I left off with the year of 1951 so lets begin there.

Year 1951, my Mothers Father recently died on September 21, 1951. During my research to locate records, I found a marriage index showing my Mother married this man in May 10, 1952. My Mother was born in 1939 which would make her thirteen years old. The record shows the estimated birth to be 1936 adding three years to her age which was the legal age to marry with adult consent and the partner had to be at least eighteen or older. Prior to this marriage my mother was living with a family by the name of Dixon. I got two different stories. One from my Mother saying she was pawned off to the Dixons who basically raised her so to speak, yet had to show up once a month for the Welfare headcount check so that her biological mother could get her monthly check. One of my Aunts with  brief conversation on the subject basically confirmed what my Mother had told years ago. Yet, another Aunt informed that all siblings got along. The one Aunt stating that everyone got along good was the youngest of all the eleven children, she was only around five years old when the adoption so to speak transpired.

Name:	Virginia L Dixon
Gender:	Female
Estimated Birth Year:	abt 1936
Age:	16
Marriage Date:	10 Mar 1952
Marriage Place:	San Francisco, California, USA
Spouse:	Prentice R Sircy
Spouse Age:	20

Source Information

Ancestry.com. California, Marriage Index, 1949-1959 [database on-line]. Provo, UT, USA: Ancestry.com Operations, Inc., 2013.

The record also shows a last name of Dixon. The marriage was not a good one from my understanding from the stories passed down to me. During her marriage, her husband allegedly kidnapped her son and took of out of state. I imagine with the aid of the Dixons, retained a lawyer to help my Mother at the age of fourteen recover her son. My Mother was put on a plan and flown to the state where her son was. She ended up in a court building and asked many questions which I can only guess what they were. The Judge ordered the child to handed over to my Mother. Her son comes in wearing coveralls, no shoes and no shirt just the coveralls. The child my brother was head to toe covered in dirt from what I have been told. I can only imagine what most parents would go through in there mind let alone at a very young age. The rumor is that they divorced or the marriage was annulled however I have found no records showing this as proof.

Fast forward to 1958, My mother would have been nineteen years old, she showed up to her mothers house, had a brief visit and her mother gave a hairbrush as a keepsake I suppose. My mother intentions as to live at the house with a boyfriend of hers. The last name of Silva comes up but no proof of that either. I am not sure what conversations took place that day but my Mother ended up leaving. My mother told me that she lived in Oregon when she was nineteen, perhaps due to the conversation my Mother had with her mother caused her to move to Oregon. I do not know but the information gathered supports the theory. During her stay in Oregon, my Mother was almost strangled to death by a man perhaps the person by the last name of Silva, I do not know. From that day forward, my mother could not stand to have anything around her neck -even on a cold day.

There are still missing pieces of this puzzle, yet with information gathered one can make a good case as to why she had become a nervous person. The slapping incident, small living arrangements for a family of that size and the new information of grandfather going on drinking binges and telling stories to scare his children and the park exposure incident, marrying at a tender age and having her son kidnapped, almost being strangled to death, some male siblings abusing her and one trying to molest her. My brothers and I may not have grew up rich, but I am grateful that we did not have the childhood that my Mother had.

Family dynamics -A candid look into my Mother’s life

Family dynamics are the patterns of relating, or interactions, between family members. Each family system and its dynamics are unique, although there are some common patterns.

Source:  http://www.strongbonds.jss.org.au/workers/families/dynamics.html

 

Genealogy is not just about amassing dates of birth and deaths on yours or someone else’s family tree. Genealogist dig for information like an Archeologist would unearthing the past by finding clues or evidence that link us to the present, the stories discovered helps to solve the family structure as a whole look at it this way. You and I are individuals with our own beliefs and opinions but, we come from a family unit that helped bridge our own way into the vast world of adulthood, now let’s think back to our great grandparents day, how they lived, what was an average day like for them, how did they survive during that time frame and most important, how did they react to one another within the family and as a whole. That is family dynamics the study of individuals interacting with one another and the family as a whole.

Think back when you were a child reacting with your siblings, parents and cousins, some will be fond memories while others will not be so pleasant to remember and it maybe like digging up old wounds for some. Now let’s expand this concept to our parents and other ancestors. How did they get along with their siblings and other relations, what was the communication link between them if any?  Through these discoveries, the complexity of the unknown can shed some light on our families and their history, granted if we do not have at least two elder relatives to help unearth information we seek to learn, then we use Census records to gather the geographical pattern of migration, land deeds if any to determine how wealthy and newspaper clippings for a brief look into a moment of their life, marriage records can also shed some light especially when one partner is twenty years their junior. A person in their fifties will not think the same as a twenty year old and vise versa.

My Mother rest her soul, always had this nervousness about her for as long as I could remember, I never know why or understood what made her so nervous but, today I think I can put the pieces of the puzzle together and form a partial imprint of the larger one waiting to be developed one day.  Earlier in my youth, my mother would tell me stories of how her bicycle was stolen while residing in San Francisco, Ca, she was surrounded by five other girls and one was rather on the large side, they taunted her-shoving her around and one slapped her leaving an imprint on my mother’s white skin.

Speculations of the time period.

My mother was about twelve years old when her bike was stolen, according to her recollection, so that brings us to the year 1951. A 1940 Census record shows her living on Fillmore street at the age of 1 and on my grandfathers  U.S. National Cemetery Interment Control Forms, 1928-1962 shows that his wife my grandmother in 1951 was residing on 2487 42nd Ave San Francisco, Ca. Ok, I now have an address for the 1950-1951 time period. I googled this address out of curiosity and the light blue residence with the green shrub in front is the dewling. My grandparents had twelve children that reached adulthood. Now, if I were to subtract two children from the 1940 Census that would leave ten children plus two adults living in this small dwelling during 1950-1951 and even if I were to subtract another child that would still leave nine children and two adults in this dwelling. We can only image the tensions that might have grew on each other.

 Another piece of the puzzle, since connecting with my first maternal cousin Karin, I recently got an email from her providing me with a bit of more information: January 27 2015

“Hi Michael,

I can’t believe all the information you retrieved on the Bradford family, it’s amazing!! Thanks for sending it to me. Aunt Lucille told me the other day that her father, our grandfather, would go on a drinking binge every 7 years for 5 days. He would also tell all the children really scary detective stories. That may explain why my mother is such a frightened person. Will be in touch.

Karin”

I am getting closer but have one more fact to add to the missing pieces, I recently had a conversation with Aunt Patricia who is my first cousins’ mother, during our conversation, she informed that her and my mother were at the park one day on the swing sets and were also petting a puppy that happened to show up. While at the park, a man exposed himself to both little girls and they ran home as fast as they could, they told their Dad what had happened and he grabbed his gun, (he was a night watchman for the graveyards) ran to the park. My Aunt tells me they never had another incident like that happen again so only one can suggest what transpired that day once my grandfather got to the park.

I have the slapping incident, small living arrangements for a family of that size and the new information of grandfather going on drinking binges and telling stories to scare his children and the park exposure incident. I can now say with a good amount of certainty why my Mother was so nervous…..

The gift of Sharing -open source

Image courtesy of stockimages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I recently read a post on the More Genealogy and there was one sentence that hit home with me. That one sentence. “I cannot understand why some of us are so reluctant to share our information.”

Why do most people hord their findings,  family photos from others.  I have been using Ancestry.com since 2014 and for the most it has treated me well but for some reason when you find a family tree that house some of the names your are researching, you send a polite message and play a waiting game in hopes of receiving a reply with help, information you had not known or the hidden treasure of a photo of a relative, yet we have reservations or maybe its hard to bare handing over family infomation. I have sent out thirty-one messages and twenty have yet to respond back. The few that have responded have all been of great help and one turned out to be a second cousin.

Maybe we are quiet, shy and reserved in our way, I know I was growing up until I started working at a  restaurant where I was employed for almost twelve years, I had to speak to the customers. Infact, not to toot my own horn but I would have a gentleman that would drive once a month from Texas and buy three gallons of my chilli and the local law enforcement would only have pie and coffee if I was not on duty.  That kind of told me something. The other cooks did not care. Maybe that is why some of us will not share our information, we simply do not care about the struggles that others are having tracking/finding  family members.

“If thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink” Romans 12:20

Genealogy has to be thought of like open source software where everyone benefits from the sharing of knowledge and resources that help many, not just one.  Another way of looking at it is like the cliche, “You scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours”.  As the pictorial above depicts, collaborating and sharing resources not with just one but many is one of the keys of unlocking the vault that houses treasures like photos or stories of a second great grandparent or a fourth cousin.